*Five Minute Friday is an initiative set up by Lisa-Jo Baker over at Surprised by Motherhood. It has now been taken over by Kate over at Heading Home. The basic premise is to take the word Kate gives and write, non-stop for 5 minutes. Then you stop and post. Read more about it here. This October, I am taking part in a series based on this called “31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes”, in which we commit to writing from the prompt as usual, but everyday rather than just on a Friday. Read more here.
Since becoming a mum, I am even more amazed by the total trust that young children have in their parents. In the last 15 months since my daughter was born, I have come to realise how parenting really is just a “learn-as-you-go” calling, and that no one is ever truly ready for parenting or is ever truly prepared for what it will be like.
I can still remember that feeling when we brought our daughter home from the hospital and realised that we weren’t expected to give her back. We were suddenly on our own with her, and it was terrifying. I wondered if every parent felt this way in that moment – my parents had always seemed to know exactly what they were doing. As far as I knew, they had this parenting thing down from the very beginning. But even they must have wondered “what next?” when they got back home with me.
You stare at this helpless little creature who you already love so inexplicably and completely and they stare back at you with complete confidence in your abilities as their carer. They trust that you will understand their needs and meet them. They believe that you know what you’re doing.
But that’s our secret, as parents, isn’t it?
We don’t know what we’re doing. Not really. We can read every book, gain knowledge from every expert, ask wisdom from older parents. And all those things are good and useful and worth doing. But in the end, much of what we do is instinct, teamwork, and trying to figure out what to do in each new scenario that crops up.
And yet they trust us. Completely.
I wish I could say I was that trusting with my Father in heaven. He has never, and will never, give me any reason not to trust Him. He loves me completely and perfectly and will never ever fail to catch me. And yet I question Him more than I would like to admit.
So I pray for a childlike faith – I pray that I would know what it is to look into the eyes of my Father and trust in Him totally, that He knows my every need and will meet them. Every time. Because He certainly isn’t making it up as He goes along. Unlike us, He knows exactly what He is doing…